United Airlines Issues Statement, considers random acts of violence

9 09 2008

Jim: (putting down a coffee mug) Welcome back to your morning news show here on WXTV. In the news today, rumors of Lance Armstrong planning a comeback and, get this Nancy, a false bankruptcy report all but wipes out United Airlines’ share price.

Nancy: Baaaad day for United’s press officer (laughs).

Jim: Yeah, you can say that again (laughs).

Nancy: The false report caused United shares to collapse by a whopping 99.2 percent to just 1 cent before trading was halted after 11am.

Jim: 1 cent. That’s amazing.

Nancy: Joining us now live this morning is our own financial expert, Buddie Wallace. Welcome to the show, Buddie. How are you doing this morning?

Buddie: Well, I’m in better shape than United, that’s for sure.

Jim: How on earth did this happen, Buddie?

Buddie: Well, a Florida newspaper reran a six-year-old Chicago Tribune story on United’s prior bankruptcy, sweeping the financial markets by storm before trading was suspended.

Nancy: Any news from United?

Buddie: Oh yeah, United has issued a statement denying it has filed for bankruptcy protection and that it is launching an investigation into what it calls “irresponsible posting of a 6-year-old Chicago Tribune article by the Florida Sun Sentinel newspaper website with the date changed“.

Jim: Well, I’ll be darned. Okay, thanks Buddie. Now, over to this morning’s traffic update…




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